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Pin the Sword on the Geek Movie

Cabbit: There's no time for us. There's no place for us. What is this thing that builds our dreams yet slips away from us?
Hamster: Er, that wasn't from West Side Story, was it?
Cabbit: It's actually from a culturally iconic movie known by all geeks and revered by all sword wielding maniacs....
Hamster: I hope that wasn't Willow.
Hamster: Or...hey, was that from Dark Crystal or whatever that show Hamp watched too much as a kid and promptly forgot was?
Cabbit: No on both counts.... :-P
Hamster: Darn. Neverending Story wasn't remotely sword wielding.
Cabbit: Nope...
Cabbit: Who has forever anyway?
Hamster: Ladyhawke?
Cabbit: Nope.
Hamster: Return to Oz didn't have swords...
Cabbit: Hamp will DOH so much when she gets it...
Hamster: And not Labyrinth either...
Hamster: Yikes, I'm starting to realize how many of these geek shows existed when I was a child.
Hamster: Oh, please don't tell me it's from He-Man.
Cabbit: Gods no. Movie, not TV show (though multiple tv show spinoffs surfaced in the 80's after 2 disastrous 80's movie sequels).
Cabbit: This would actually predate Hampy existence, suspects Cabbit. *goes to IMDB to check*
Hamster: Predating Hamp? But that's Star Wars.
Hamster: Conan?
Cabbit: Closer.
Hamster: Red Sonja.
Cabbit: Conan was closer, but still a long way off...
Hamster: Hercules? But Hercules was bodybuilding...
Cabbit: *corrects self* Its actually a full 10 years newer than Cabbit thought. Well into Hampy lifespan.
Cabbit: Sean Connery had a largish role...
Hamster: Well into Hamp lifespan? *thinks* Sean Connery? *rifles through brain*
Cabbit: Not his greatest role. He hammed it up a lot.
Cabbit: How do you fight such a savage? With heart, faith and skill.
Hamster: I'm thinking of a King Arthur epic, but I can't remember the name.
Hamster: Was Sean Connery in Robin Hood?
Cabbit: *sad* Not that Cabbit knows of. Think of lots and lots of kilts rampaging across a battlefield, followed by a sudden transition to modern day NY.
Hamster: Kilts, you say? *thinks* Can't be Braveheart. That's too new.

Connery: The Kurgan. He is the strongest of all the immortals. He's the *perfect* warrior. If he wins the Prize, mortal man would suffer an eternity of darkness.
Goofy kid in training: How do you fight such a savage?
Connery: With heart, faith and skill. In the end there can be only one.

Hamster: I would even say, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but that's missing the kilt part.
Cabbit: *chokes madly*
Hamster: Ghostbusters 2? That has no swords!
Cabbit: No... No it's not turtle related, and lacks ghosties....

Without the kilt and the NY hint, I'd probably have just wandered off into Princess Bride. And yet, from the time I was three, my favourite of the lot was what caused that admiration for Ozma and Mombi and the reason to watch The Craft. Ah, childhood memories...


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 6th, 2006 05:50 pm (UTC)
I'm surprised that you didn't mention Krull. ;-)
Jun. 6th, 2006 05:54 pm (UTC)
Unfortunately, I never watched Krull. :(
Jun. 6th, 2006 07:10 pm (UTC)
I haven't watched Ladyhawke. ;-)

Krull was a movie that I found mildly addictive as a child. I have no idea why. I knew, even then, that it was a bad movie.

Barely related, I need to own a copy of Willow for my collection.
Jun. 7th, 2006 05:54 am (UTC)
I watched most of these things because it showed on teevee, and were repeated quite often. :)

Willow caused quite a stir in Malaysia when it showed on very late night TV. Apparently, the censorship board didn't like it. I remember staying up to see it after all the hype, and realizing it was really kind of so-so.

But Return to Oz, and a Japanese version of animated Swan Lake, were my two favouritest movies ever, aged 3-5. :)
Jun. 6th, 2006 06:47 pm (UTC)

Rob Roy!

Kilts! Swords! Angst! Wheeeeeeee!

(Some of the bestest sword choreography EVER, by the way.)
Jun. 7th, 2006 05:46 am (UTC)
Ooo, never saw that one! *jots*
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )