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And Then It Hit Me.

As I recorded myself reading The Bomoh, I realized that when I am a horrible and famous author, I could sneak my way into readings electronically this way. It is an appropriate medium for my work. I'm terrified of people, and even worse at public performances. I figure that my being at a convention and trying to mingle would just embarrass people. On the other hand, electronic pieces of me don't need airplane tickets. I have less chances of being around people for lengths that would cause me to make them uncomfortable (well, in a way that's unrelated to my writing, anyway). So in an ideal world, I could be a disembodied voice.

Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
countlibras
May. 12th, 2006 04:39 am (UTC)
A chicken's penis? ahahaha!

Um, anyway, I've decided that you sound like an Australian who's spent too many years in America. :D



Well we can video conference you into a convention. Or be all internet cool and make you some Flash cartoons to go with your narration. Or just stick figure drawings. Or huge Flash cartoons of just stick figures drawings. ;-)

I hate public performances too. *eek!*
vampyrichamster
May. 12th, 2006 04:45 am (UTC)
But I've only been in Oz fer two yeeeears! *WEEPZ*
The last darn thing I wanted to sound like was Australian! ;P

I could video conference me into a convention, and probably pose for half an hour. I could make me some animated hamsters to go with my narration. Or I could go Shirt Guy Dom and do stickmen, but hamsters are just beanbags with ears anyway. ;)

And it is true. All the chickens I've eaten, including ones I knew alive, have been girls.

(Out of curiosity, was my reading easily heard? Still not sure what the recording quality would come out like on other people's PCs.)
countlibras
May. 12th, 2006 12:32 pm (UTC)
Maybe roosters aren't as yummy. Or maybe they are kept strictly for mating purposes. Or maybe chickens are naturally predisposed to laying more girl eggs than boy eggs.

I never really thought about it.

I had to put my speakers (which are just built in ones) on the highest volume, but I could hear you fine.

It was a few words like "weird" that made me think Australian. Definitely not an American accent. The rest of your speech was without any strong accents.
vampyrichamster
May. 12th, 2006 03:10 pm (UTC)
Thanks for that. I wondered if all that file conversion messed up the volumes.

It probably is a mix of laying more girl eggs than boys, but also that hens are probably more favoured by breeders because they produce eggs and can be meat. I guess we won't ever know if the chicken breast in the supermarket was a boy or a girl.

I like using "weird". I never thought about it in a cultural context, but if you asked me before this, I would've said "weird" was an Americanism. This is definitely turning out interesting. Thanks again!
countlibras
May. 12th, 2006 03:51 pm (UTC)
Oh, I didn't mean the usage of 'weird'. (yeah, that's very American) It was your pronounciation of the vowels and the 'r' sound that sounded Aussie to me. :)
vampyrichamster
May. 12th, 2006 04:03 pm (UTC)
Oh! :)
eekers
May. 13th, 2006 07:50 pm (UTC)
I think you have a lovely voice, rather dulcet and lissome. :)

I would like to hear you read a poem.

I would like to hear you do more of an impression when you read aloud peoples speeches - but mainly for pure enjoyment on my part.

Can you sing?
vampyrichamster
May. 14th, 2006 05:18 am (UTC)
Dulcet and lissome? *turns pink*
Y'know. I should probably have read on of my poems for a start, instead of doing a whole short story, though I did want to get out "The Bomoh" first.

I can't sing. I daren't, really.

Interestingly, as the English friend who says I have a frightful opinion of English cliches, I don't suppose you had an opinion about what my accent was in the reading?
eekers
May. 14th, 2006 04:14 pm (UTC)
Poems have a lyrical quality that suits recordings... kinda not worth saying really, if you think how close a poem is to music, but I suspect this is a great idea I am having yet am not literate enough to express it well.

I would like to hear you sing :)

You sound similar to last time I heard you, not more australian. At one point I would have said you sound american, but its not that.... but I dont know the word for it. Its a kind of accent developed by people who speak asian and english languages, usually with parents from asia originally, now living in europe, america, oz etc. My friend Su has a similar accent after long periods in Indo, it mellows more and more when she returns home.. If anything I think you sound less accented now than last time.... I wish I knew the words for this, I am sure someone has done a thesis and labelled this "accent" and its development... :)

I secretly love your opinion of everything English, it makes me laugh so much! :D
vampyrichamster
May. 14th, 2006 04:44 pm (UTC)
Eeks, you are expressing yourself most clearly. :)
I will have to consider this poem reading thing...
And you don't want to hear me sing. Trust me. ;)
(I'm tempted, but even I'm not that evil to my friends.)

Thanks about the accent. Slightly relieved that I am still relatively accent-unplaceable. I do know the Asian accent you're referring to, actually. It's interesting. But I am mostly happy I sound coherent and easily understood. My pronunciation's terrible. I can't pronouce a lot of words I commonly write, and that probably showed in the read. ;)

That, and because I recorded most of this in one pass at 3AM, I actually slur off at the end, with many run-ons and lazy words. But it is good to know that I'm getting more accent-unplaceable. Well, it's not that I think accents are bad, but an unplaceable accent works for me -- people won't have to worry about where I'm from.

Speaking of all things English, I still live under the delusion from ancient English textbooks that state the British all drink excessive amounts of tea with biskits, scones and stingy sandwiches. You never could disprove that one, could you? ;P
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )